Tim Terrio: The Secret of Having Anything you Want!

Is anything really possible? Can you really have anything you desire? Can you really be happy? Is the American Dream still alive? In the last blog I talked about why New Years Resolutions fail but a further look at the statistics shows that our failures don't end with resolutions. It is now reported that 95-98% of diets fail. The failure rate of new businesses is reported to be around the same number 95% (depending on which businesses your include in the sample set). With all of this failure around, is anything really possible? What is the secret of the 5% who success against seemingly overwhelming odds? I truly believe that we live in the greatest Country in the world with amazing opportunity all around so what's up with the failure rate?

We are immersed in the information age, with unprecedented access to information and yet we are failing at an extremely high rate. There are a variety of opinions out there about 'how to get everything you want', everything from 'the law of positive attraction', to 'prayer', to reading books or attending seminars with 'experts.' Is the secret to success and having what you want really as simple as sending out a 'prayer' or simply creating a desire for something you want and then it will find you? Most 'experts' tell us that the key is to write goals, not just any goal but a SMART goal (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-based). Most New Year's Resolutions are perfect SMART goals..."I will lose 30lbs by June". Is that goal Specific, yes. Is it Measurable, yes, just have to step on the scale. Is it Achievable, absolutely. Is it Relevant, it is if you have more than 30 lbs to lose and is it time-based, yep, by June. Does it fail? Yea, a majority of the time our goals fade away and die. So, what's the secret?

Let's start with looking at our current situation. We all live in a personal reality that was 100% created by us. We are 100% responsible for where our life is and where it is going. Yes, we are an accumulation of past experiences and circumstances but we are the ones who apply the meaning to these events. We all live through various experiences and some people endure horrible, unthinkable experiences, but it is precisely the meaning that we assign to them that determines who we are. As we sit in our present situation and try to determine what action to take, we constantly reference our past experiences for guidance. Acknowledging and learning from the past is very important, but too many people become victims of their past and they limit their decisions today based on what happened in the past. We have a lot of help along the way, parents, teachers, coaches, family and friends all help us define who we are...'he's a great athlete', 'she's very uncoordinated', 'she's very smart', 'he's not the sharpest tool in the box' and on and on. If we allow ourselves or others to define us and what we are capable or incapable of doing, then our window of opportunity is immediately decreased. "Why don't you go to college?" and the story comes back "no one from my family ever went to college." "I really want to lose weight but I've always had a weight problem." and thus we further entrench ourselves in our proverbial 'Box.' Opportunity does not live in our 'box', it does not live in the information that we know. It lives in the realm of information that we either know, we don't know or that we don't even know that we don't know it. Thus, the reason that the more we learn the more we realize that there is even more to learn. OK, so by know you're probably saying OK, great, we need to learn more and we need to be open to opportunity, but what's the Freaking secret.

The secret of having anything that you want or desire can be found in five simple questions. Starting from your current state (complete honesty is essential) decide specifically what it is that you want and then ask your self:
1. What am I willing to start doing that will move me closer to my goal?
2. What am I willing to stop doing that is keeping me from moving toward my goal?
3. What am I NOT willing to start doing to help me move forward?
4. What am I NOT willing to give up?
5. Am I willing to have the discipline that it will take to keep moving toward my goal.

Usually, the thing that stops us from getting what we want is not what we are willing to do to achieve it but what we are NOT willing to give up. Is anything possible? Living in America, the answer is yes BUT only if you are willing to do what is necessary to achieve the goal including giving up on the things that are holding you back. Realize that success is a journey and not a destination and that our choices not luck or circumstance will determine our destiny. It is not an easy road and it will take perseverance and determination to navigate, the question is how important is it to you??

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